


First and last words

by AniZH



Category: Victorious (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, F/M, Romantic Soulmates, Soulmates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-12
Updated: 2018-08-12
Packaged: 2019-06-26 07:51:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,215
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15658944
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AniZH/pseuds/AniZH
Summary: Only every fifth person has a soulmate and it’s something extremely special. When you’re born your soulmate’s first words to you are already written on the inside of your wrist. After they’re said, they vanish and instead their last words to you will be engraved on your chest for the rest of your life.





	First and last words

**Author's Note:**

> I proudly present this long one shot! It’s a soulmate!AU because I love those. I still tried to fit it as much with canon as possible because I also love to do that. ;) Please, enjoy.

Not many people had soulmates.  
Having a soulmate was something extremely special. It was a bond, most of the time of romantic nature, that was closer than any other. Having a soulmate meant having a person in the world that stands by you no matter what, that loves you unconditionally, that gives you comfort without trying, that you feel a connection to that some describe as magical. It’s commonly accepted that soulmates are, on special occasions, able to read each other’s thoughts or feel when the other is hurt. Noone knows how it works but it does.  
It all starts with the first words the soulmates speak to each other, years and decades before they actually do. They already have the mark when they are born. It mostly looks like a black smudge on the inner side of their left wrist. But when they grow, as their arms grow too, words get readable. In fine print, the first words their soulmates will ever say to them shows, engraved on their body.  
As soon as they meet their soulmate and the words are said, those same words on their wrists will fade away and leave a scar, while words will appear on the left side of their chests, above their heart, also in very fine print. The last words your soulmate will ever say to you. More often than not, with soulmates, for one of them those words also end up to be the last they ever speak.

o  
O  
o  
O  
o

Tori loves the idea of soulmates. Though not even every fifth person has a soulmate, many romantic movies are all about that. She has watched them since she has been little and always hated that her own wrist was blank. Often, she wrote words on her wrist herself, as soon as she could, and invented stories in her head about how she would meet the person saying those words. Her father sometimes played along. He did with Trina too.  
But neither of them have a mark, nor do their parents. It’s fine. You can be happy without it.  
She learns not to get jealous anymore of classmates who have a mark. While she stared at every wrist upon first meeting someone back when she was in elementary school, she long doesn’t anymore in high school. When she meets Andre and gets into Hollywood Arts later on, she only ends up noticing his mark when she already visits the school for two weeks.  
The marks are inconspicuous enough on the inside of your wrist that your eyes aren‘t automatically drawn to it if you don’t look out for it.  
Sometimes, she tries to read the words from then on without him noticing, but it’s not like a person usually lies his hands down that way, showing the inside of one’s wrists. And the print is so small that you can’t read it in passing.  
She knows she’s too curious. Yeah, maybe a bit nosy. But... it’s just so exciting. Andre’s having a soulmate!  
At one point, after several months of knowing him, she asks. They’re having a fun evening together, making music, and he’s written a song about finding your soulmate that he now played for her. She has to approach the subject.  
“You’re having a soulmate, right?”  
Andre doesn’t hesitate, doesn’t seem uncomfortable about her asking though she learned that some people don’t like it. “I do.”  
Tori doesn’t know where the discomfort comes from for some people. She heard some just feel weird about the possibility of a soulmate, maybe are even scared of it, of that perfect companion, because what if they don’t feel like they are supposed to about that person? But if it’s meant to be... how can there be anything wrong? How can you be worried?  
“Can I ask what their first words to you will be?” Tori gently checks.  
Andre seems surprised and yet pleased about the question. “Sure.”  
Tori also would always be ready to show the words. She knows a lot of celebrities don’t in public. It happens for those, who show their mark openly, that fans but also haters constantly run up to them, saying those words, sometimes even the press on the red carpet. The fans to feel close to their star, some, who have a mark themselves, in hope that their celebrity responds accordingly. Their haters do it to mess with them, to enjoy just that little moment where the celebrity thinks that it might be real this time. The press do it to get a good picture with the person looking in their direction.  
It’s awful and Tori gets that they don’t want anyone to know the words. She doesn’t get it with your normal person, except they are something embarrassing.  
Andre’s aren’t embarrassing. There, on the inside of his wrist, three words are engraved: “That sounded amazing.”  
Tori reads it and has to smile. Her smile gets wider when Andre informs her: “I like to think it’s about a music piece I wrote myself.”  
He seems dreamy but giddy at the same time. Tori can imagine how much he already thought what it could be about. Maybe, it’s also about something else. A good song in a club by someone else, and the person just randomly telling Andre this. But Tori gets that Andre would like it to be about his own music – and thrives to write better music because of it, so that that person can rightfully compliment him. That person is making him a better person already, without even knowing. Is that also part of being soulmates?  
“I hope I’ll be there when you meet them,” Tori says with a grin. “Just to witness.”  
Andre grins as well: “Sure. I would let everybody witness if it was up to me.”

Seeing the look in Andre’s face makes Tori’s love for this whole soulmate thing blow up once more and keeps it alive again.  
Months after their talk, she swoons over a play her classmate Clary has written, which is about that fateful first meeting as well. It’s perfect with a misunderstanding at first and even more happiness in the end.  
At lunch, she talks to her friends about it and eventually, she turns to Beck: “Why don’t you audition for it?”  
The description of the main male character fits Beck ridiculously well. It might be that Clary wrote it for him. But as she doesn’t play the female lead herself, Tori doesn’t think Jade should worry about it or get jealous of it – and either way, Beck shouldn’t need Jade to approve of the play he audtions for. It’s a well written play.  
Beck shrugs. “Not really interested in that play.”  
“I know Clary would love to cast you in it,” Tori knows to report.  
Dryly, Jade says: “I bet she would.” Okay, so she doesn’t want Beck to audition. But usually, Beck still does what he wants to do. He can handle Jade’s jealousy.  
But Tori won’t say more about it, won’t get involved in their relationship. Instead: “Anyway... I would love a love story like the one Clary wrote.”  
“You’d like a soulmate, wouldn’t you? Who doesn’t?” Robbie checks.  
Andre gives them a sympathetic look.  
Cat meanwhile states: “Maybe everyone has a soulmate. Who says that only those people have one that have that mark? My parents don’t have a mark but love each other beyond compare.”  
That somehow sounds pretty wise to Tori. Though she thinks it does make a difference. A difference she now talks about: “Yeah, but soulmates are more, aren’t they? I would love to have that person with whom I fit perfectly. You know... In every way. With whom I never have to compromise or fight, because it just works...”  
With that she has gotten Jade’s attention again. She raises her eyebrows and asks: “Why do you think soulmates don’t fight or compromise?”  
That’s a dumb question, right? Tori pulls her eyebrows together. “Because they don’t. They’re perfect for each other.”  
Jade snorts. “That’s stupid.”  
“What do you know?” Tori says, feeling a bit offended.  
But instead of biting back, Jade only rolls her eyes.

That makes Tori think because Jade never just stops like that. She kinda always has the last word. Why didn’t she go for it this time?  
And why did she look at Tori in that way that always makes Tori feel extremely stupid, when Tori claimed soulmates don’t fight and don’t need to compromise? Granted, Jade often looks at Tori like that but... only if she actually knows better herself, if she knows Tori’s wrong.  
How would she know this? Tori knows Jade’s own parents are divorced, so they can’t be soulmates. Oh... Or can they be? Are they soulmates and not in love?  
Or does Jade just believe that soulmates also fight because she fights with Beck a lot and feels like they are as good as soulmates?  
Or... are they soulmates?  
The thought surprises Tori. Could that be? No, it can’t be, right?  
If they are soulmates, they won’t have a mark on their wrist anymore, but on the chest above their hearts. Well, and Jade definitely doesn’t. She often wears tops or dresses that would show such a mark and there never has been one.  
Though... Whenever the gang has gone swimming like to the beach for example... Both Beck and Jade have worn a small piece of band-aid above their heart.  
Tori has never wondered about it. People wore band-aids sometimes. People got hurt or got themselves hickeys and yes, she totally thought they made themselves hickeys at the same spot for some reason and wanted to cover those. How could there be soulmate marks if Jade otherwise never had one?  
But now that Tori thinks about it... Beck always wears that band-aid when his chest shows, so also if they meet up when it ‘s really warm or alike.  
There’s band-aid that easily holds, no matter sweat or water. It’s absolutely common and yes, soulmates also use it on their chest. Most soulmates don’t want to show their mark on their chest in public as they are their soulmates’ last words to them and it’s almost like they feel like they’re private.  
Tori doesn’t know how she would feel about that. She never really thought about those last words, always more about the first. That’s also what most movies and stories are about. The first words, not the last.  
Tori has also heard though that you can manage to cover up your marks with make-up. Is that what Jade is doing when she doesn’t have to go swim? She doesn’t sweat, so there’s no risk of the make-up running off on a usual day, no matter how much she shows of her chest.  
But... isn’t that still crazy? They can’t be soulmates! They already met when they were fourteen! Soulmates don’t meet that early. Not to mention that Beck and Jade were broken up in between. They have just gotten back together like two months ago.  
But... What if Beck doesn’t want to be in Clary’s play, because yes, at one point the mark on the character’s wrist would vanish and instead a mark on his chest would show. There are ways in the business to have a plain band-aid on your own mark, cover it with make up and alike and put a fake mark on top of it. But if he wouldn’t want anybody to know at all about the soulmate mark...  
Jade also didn’t tell about them being soulmates when Tori asks her what she knows about the phenomenon. If they actually are, they for some reason keep it a secret.

Tori wants to check her theory. She tells herself that it’s all nonsense, that it’s too far-fetched. Why would they not want anybody to know? Especially Jade who always gets so jealous. She would love every girl to know that she’s Beck’s soulmate and that nobody else can compete, right?  
But still... She’ll check, the best way she knows how.  
They are eating lunch again, about a week later, and she tells her friends all about how she supposedly learned how to read palms. Finally, she tells Beck to give her his hand, so she can prove it.  
Beck humors her and holds out the requested left hand. He offers the inside of his hand and Tori takes it in both of hers. But instead of looking at the hand itself, her eyes directly wander to his wrist. And there it is, very faint, a small scar.  
“You have a soulmate mark,” Tori says, unbelieving.  
“What?” Beck asks himself with a furrowed brow though, with everyone else also looking at Tori in surprise.  
Tori runs her thumb over the scar. “That’s a soulmate mark, isn’t it?”  
“It’s a scar,” Beck easily replies.  
It of course could be a normal scar, but Tori doesn’t believe it. What kind of coincidence would that be?  
“Where did you get it?” she therefore asks while letting go of his hand.  
He doesn’t hurry to pull it away again, doesn’t hurry to hide the scar. “Don’t know,” he answers shrugging. “Have it ever since I can remember.”  
Tori narrows her eyes at him and then also glances over to Jade, who looks like she couldn’t care less about the conversation going on, instead picks at her food. That doesn’t give Tori a clue if her theory is right.  
Andre asks confused: “Why should he have a scar from a soulmate mark? That would mean he already met his soulmate.”  
Tori watches Jade closely, as she says: “Yes. Jade.”  
The other girl slowly looks up with a raised eyebrow but doesn’t say anything. Their friends are only staring now.  
“Show me your wrist,” Tori demands and is already reaching over Beck to Jade, to just take her left hand that’s lying next to the box she’s eating out of.  
Jade pulls her hand away though. “No.”  
“Why not?” Tori asks, certain of her vistory, certain she already proved that Jade had the same scar.  
Jade looks at her weirded out though. “Because it’s my wrist, creep.”  
And suddenly, there’s Robbie, looking between Beck and Jade curiously. “Are you soulmates?”  
“You are, aren’t you?” Tori says and now looks at the spot where a soulmate mark should show beneath Jade’s low cut shirt: “There’s make-up on your chest, isn’t there?”  
And then, Jade snaps. Quietly but with all the threat in the world in her voice, she says: “Shut up. Not another word.”  
“Am I right?” Tori asks, but only in a whisper as if she would dare anything else after that demand by Jade.  
Beck looks around while Jade quietly scolds: “I said shut up! If you have to, talk to us about it when we’re over at your house later. But not another word here.”  
They all want to meet up later today, at Tori’s house like so often.  
And Tori’s fine with waiting until then. Even if neither would show up then... It’s not like they can run away now or make Tori forget about it. The others also seem more than interested now.  
Tori will shut up about it until then.

Beck and Jade are the last to come to Tori’s place that late afternoon, but they often are. Their friends are meanwhile talking about Tori’s supposed discovery. Cat, Robbie and Andre have never thought about it apparently and want to know how Tori got the idea, so she tells them.  
Beck and Jade don’t ring the doorbell or knock, just walk in. And Tori decides she also doesn’t need any kind of greetings then. Instead, she gets directly to it: “So: Are you soulmates?”  
“You annoy me so much,” Jade responds without hesitating but also without any heat.  
They stop in the middle of the living room. Cat and Robbie are also sitting on one of the couches while Tori and Andre have still busied themselves in the kitchen to take care of drinks for everyone.  
They forget all about that and just walk around to the couple, when Beck simply states: “We are.”  
“Really?”  
“What?”  
“How?”  
Beck looks at them apologetically. “We never told you because we don’t need everyone to know.”  
“Why?” Tori asks. “It’s beautiful.”  
Jade rolls her eyes. “We don’t need girls ripping Beck’s shirt off to see my last words to him.”  
Tori’s eyes widen and only then, it hits her. She stares at Beck. “You have her last words to you written across your chest.” Possibly, Jade’s last words ever.  
Yes, Tori has thought about soulmates a lot, but, again, mainly about the first words. She has known about the last too but never... cared for them all that much. Suddenly the magnitude hits her. Beck and Jade know what their last words to each other will be. They know with which words one of their lives will draw to an end.  
“I do,” Beck simply says as if that wasn’t a crazy and somewhat terrifying thought. “And she has mine to her.”  
Tori’s eyes flicker to her chest again where she must have covered them with make-up. Beck’s last words to her.  
Jade must’ve noticed, at least she suddenly says in a threatening tone: “Don’t dare to ask what they are.”  
Beck puts his arm around her, calming, while Robbie hurries to say, maybe also having looked at the spots where each their words should be: “We would never.”  
“We really wouldn’t,” Tori confirms.  
Andre meanwhile wants to know, confused: “Weren’t we around when you first met?”  
“You were,” Beck says but doesn’t seem to know what Andre is getting at.  
He continues: “How didn’t we notice? I mean... I will freak out as soon as I hear these words.”  
He makes a gesture to his own wrist and Beck shrugs with a smile: “Well, we didn’t on the outside. We both tried to play it cool.”  
“I was cool. You tried to play it,” Jade says with a smirk.  
Beck turns to her and it’s that look in his eye when Jade teases him like that. That loving look. Promptly, he pulls Jade into a kiss which she returns passionately.  
Their friends share glances. Wow. So, they’re actually soulmates. And weirdly enough, now that they know, it doesn’t surprise them as much as it probably should. Somehow, it makes sense.

o  
O  
o  
O  
o

Jade doesn’t like her soulmate mark. She was weirded out by it when she was little because noone else in her family had something alike and it felt like dirt she couldn’t manage to rub off. Her mother told her that it was something really special and she should be happy and she started to believe her when the smudge turned into clear words.  
“You’re the one that aced the Bird Scene, huh?”  
She didn’t know what it meant when her mother read it to her for the first time. She also didn’t know what it meant when she reread it over and over when she grew up.  
She got annoyed by everyone in her school being curious about it. She also hated those kids that prided themselves on having a soulmate mark and compared theirs with that of others, rating which first meeting would be better, judging by the words.  
And before Jade knows it, other kids are making fun of the words on her wrist. She knows they’re just looking for some way to make fun of her. They for some reason hate her. At least these two girls and somehow everyone likes them, so everyone hates Jade and laughs along with them. Jade’s used to being an outsider. She has been in kindergarten already. But elementary school is worse.  
As if she could ever “ace” anything, they say and laugh themselves silly though Jade easily gets good grades.  
And what kind of stupid thing must the Bird Scene be? Does she imitate a bird really well? Will she work as a birdie mascott later in life and perform something for that really well?  
They start to imitate chirping around her and it’s oh so funny.  
Jade covers her mark from then on. She doesn’t want anybody to know about it. And though everybody in her elementary school knows that it’s something with a bird, soon they stop talking about it. The two girls find something else to make fun off with her – and then find someone else entirely when her non-reactions get boring to them.  
With her covering the mark and possibly everyone growing up a bit, it doesn’t seem to be interesting anymore. In middle school, she never shows her mark and makes sure that people don’t even know she has one. It’s easy enough to combine wristbands with her style or wide bracelets or alike.  
She herself knows it’s there though. She knows that one day she will meet that person, uttering those words as their first to her. She just hopes it won’t be in an awful context like her classmates always suggested.

 

Beck’s parents are also each other’s soulmates and have told him since he was born how happy they are that he has a soulmate too. They couldn’t believe their eyes when they saw the mark on his infant body, and couldn’t help but tear up, knowing their son also was destined to have a great love like they have.  
They don’t appreciate the words that showed over time too much.  
“What is it any of your business?”  
The person sounds a bit rude, they say. But... Maybe there’s a good reason for it. Maybe Beck’s too nosy.  
Beck doesn’t know if this means he shouldn’t be nosy or if this means that he actually should be, so that his soulmate has a reason to ask him that question.  
It scares him. What if he chooses a wrong path and therefore won’t meet his soulmate after all – or never know it’s them. Or change himself in a way that makes him so different that he and his soulmate suddenly aren’t soulmates anymore?  
His parents say that that’s ridiculous and that he can’t do wrong with his soulmate. They don’t take him and his worries seriously. It’s so easy for them. They already found each other and are happy.  
He starts to close off. If his parents don’t take him seriously anyway...  
He knows he shouldn’t worry about his soulmate. He also tries not to anymore. What will happen, will happen. Others also survive without soulmates. Though his family is surprisingly full of them.  
He also doesn’t make a big deal about his soulmate mark. It’s small enough and barely noticeable on the inside of his wrist, if you don’t look for it specifically. With his careless attitude, also about the mark, nobody else cares as well, not really.

 

They are at Hollywood Arts for a month and everyone in their year is fully concentrated on the Bird Scene.  
Jade has frozen when Sikowitz mentioned it in their first class and told them all that they have to pass it before they can audition for plays. The Bird Scene.  
She has grabbed her wrist that she covered with a wristband once again.  
Could this be true? Did supposed soulmates meet this early? She’s only 14.  
For a few days she considers screwing the scene up on purpose, just to see what will happen. To make sure she isn’t meeting that person already. That person that is suppose to love her and that she’s supposed to love and... she doesn’t want all that. The thought of that person scares her. The thought of having to be... loveable for them, having to fulfill expectations, having to love them... She doesn’t want to meet that person. Not yet, maybe never.  
But she won’t screw this up. She wants to succeed and she will. Maybe there will be another Bird Scene one day. Or maybe there will be a high school reunion when she’s fifty and there will another graduate who will say that to her, after she made herself a legend at this school and everyone knows about her scene for years to come.  
It’s a ridiculous thought but hey, more ridiculous things have happened, she’s sure. She won’t let the fact that she might not want to have anything to do with her soulmate stop her in her way.  
The thing is, when she’s done with the scene, Sikowitz doesn’t praise her at all. He instead suggests that she hasn’t done it right.  
It irritates her like hell. Not because of the soulmate thing and those words written on her wrist, but because she did a good job but everybody in this Junior class and Sikowitz act like she didn’t.  
The soulmate thing is in her mind for a second. Well, seems like someone will mock her with those words. Her soulmate’s first words will be all about mocking her. She hates them already.  
But right now, she has to set Sikowitz straight.  
She tells him that she did good and that she won’t do it again. Because why should she? It was good and he doesn’t even say what she should change. How can she make it better without real feedback?  
And that’s all there is to it. After she heard about many of her classmates already failing their first attempt, she passes. Just like that. Sikowitz tells her that it’s all about the right attitude, about creating something and knowing that you created something good.  
After the next break, everybody seems to know her. Apparently, it rarely happens that someone passes that scene on their first try – hence her “acing” it though they don’t actually get a grade for it. And many people congratulate her about it. She hates every one of them, as every mention of the Bird Scene makes her think of those words on her wirst. But also because most of her year only congratulate her to then ask her how she did it.

Cat has befriended her pretty much on the first day. That’s what Cat claims happened though Jade only recently decided to let Cat be her friend – though she has no idea why Cat wants that.  
And now, Cat walks alongside her, blabbering on about her last class, while they take their lunch from the food truck and pass along the tables to see where they can sit.  
Cat notices Robbie and interrupts herself. “Oh, Robbie! He has helped me in my English class!”  
And promptly she pulls Jade with her over to the table Robbie is sitting at with two other boys, whom Jade knows to be named Andre and Beck. She might’ve exchanged a few glances with Beck here and there. Heck, she might be attracted to him and is pretty sure, he also is to her with the way he looks at her.  
“Hiii!” Cat tells the group. “Robbie! Thank you again for helping me in class!”  
“Of course,” Robbie says, looking a bit flustered just by Cat thanking him like that. He also has his stupid puppet with him again. He carries that around all the time. Jade sometimes wondered what happened to him that he needs an outlet like that.  
“You’re Cat and Jade, right?” Andre checks and Cat affirms that happily.  
Beck shortly smiles at her, before he turns to Jade though, much more attentive: “You’re the one that aced the Bird Scene, huh?”  
Something inside of her freezes, like it always has whenever someone talked about the Bird Scene around her. She gets sick of it, sick of all these words that could almost be the ones on her wrist. Well, all the others were almost and somewhat those on her wrist. She doesn’t need to check to know that these are the exact words that she has engraved on her body since birth.  
She looks at Beck and can’t help but react harshly, with her heart being frozen inside of her and yet pounding hard and loud all of the sudden: “What is it any of your business?”  
She sees Beck’s eyes widen and his right hand jumping to his left wrist.  
And that’s it. That’s all. Jade knows he’s the one. She just responded with the way his soulmate mark predicted. She hasn’t noticed he had a mark. He won’t have anymore. Not on his wrist. Not now that she said the words.  
Suddenly, he smiles, not mentioning what just happened, not making a big deal out of what might’ve happened: “I’m just impressed. Having my first try tomorrow.”  
Nobody else noticed his eyes widen. Everyone looked at Jade when she asked him what it is of his business in that way.  
“I didn’t master it,” Andre truthfully says and Cat knows to report that she also had her first turn already but has so many ideas for her second try.  
Beck and Jade look at each other for another moment before Beck finally looks down, turning his left hand, finding the inside of his wrist blank. She knows hers must be too under the wristband and instead she must suddenly have words written across her chest above her heart. The last words this boy will ever say to her. Maybe, his last words ever.

 

Jade’s glad that Beck doesn’t try to talk to her more that day. She needs time to process this. He apparently needs too. Needs to wrap his head around the fact that they met each other.  
At home, Jade is quick to lock herself into the bathroom and finally get rid of the wristband first. She finds a faint scar where the words about the Bird Scene have once been. She takes a deep breath. Then, she gets out of her shirt and slowly moves in front of the mirror.  
It’s not hard to read the words that are neatly engraved on her chest, above her heart.  
“I love you, too.”  
She reads them again and again, moves her hand over them.  
She knows what this must mean for the words across his chest – for her last words to him. So, their last words will be about loving each other.  
She doesn’t know how to feel about that. She doesn’t know how she feels at all about Beck being her soulmate. Damn.

Beck meanwhile also stands in front of the mirror in his childhood home, inspecting his chest.  
“I love you.”  
He can’t help but smile. She will love him. That girl that immediately grabbed his attention, that he thought about asking out one of these days because he found her attractive and liked her attitude whenever he saw her... That girl that seems so unapproachable and wild... She will love him.  
And yes, he’s scared again now. Scared that he will do something wrong again that will erase the words on his chest some day, as if he doesn’t deserve them anymore.  
But he’s also excited. He’s excited to get to know Jade and to get to the bottom of what having a soulmate really means.

The next morning, Beck walks up to Jade in front of her locker. She anticipated that. Obviously they have to somewhat talk about this, right? Though she’s still wearing the wristband. She didn’t want her mother to notice this morning as well as yesterday that she must’ve met her soulmate. She would’ve made a big deal about it and Jade couldn’t have stood it.  
“Hey, Jade,” he says.  
She only looks at him and doesn’t respond.  
He takes it with ease and just asks what he came here to ask: “Wanna go out tonight?”  
Well, and she does want to know what this is all about. What makes him her soulmate. Not to mention that she is attracted to him and would’ve gone on a date with him as well if he didn’t turn out to be her soulmate.  
So she shrugs: “Sure.”

They meet at a restaurant for dinner that evening. A restaurant that isn’t too fancy, but also not at a fast food place. They pick a table in the far corner to be able to talk in peace, to get to know each other.  
Though there is one thing Jade has to say before Beck gets any ideas, so as soon as they’ve placed their order, she says: “Just to be clear: I’m not convinced of this soulmate business. I don’t care what you’re supposed to be. I don’t have to love you.”  
Being soulmates doesn’t have to mean anything. She decided that a long time ago. They are supposed to love each other, yes. But parents are also supposed to love and support their children and her father still exist. Who cares what is supposed to be?  
Beck blinks in confusion. She isn’t convinced of “this soulmate business”? It’s a universal truth that soulmates exist, what’s there to be convinced of?  
Well, but... “Obviously, you don’t have to.” Nobody will force her to love him. “Soulmates do.” And she will love him, according to the words across his chest.  
And that’s also what Jade is thinking about. Those words that must be there.  
“I know what’s written on you,” she says out of nowhere.  
How can she know? “What’s on you?” he checks.  
She takes a look around but noone spares them a glance. Carefully she pulls her top down to reveal her soulmate mark.  
Beck stares upon the words that declare that he also loves Jade. He likes it. He likes that these will be their last words to each other, confirming their love.  
He promptly opens up the first buttons on his shirt and also reveals his mark to Jade, so she can see her words too, can be sure it’s about her saying I Love You to him.  
She stares just like he did and he says with a smile: “This is weird.” Knowing your last words to each other. Possibly knowing the last words one of them will ever say.  
Jade suddenly shrugs as she adjusts herself, covering the mark back up. “I don’t care for it,” she claims with a casual voice.  
Beck knows she does but he won’t say that. If she wants to pretend, it’s fine with him. Apparently, she isn’t into having a soulmate as much as he is, maybe is weirded out a bit by the concept. He guesses that her parents might not be soulmates, unlike his, that she didn’t grow up with it like he did.  
“Anyway...” he says as he also buttons back up. “Let’s enjoy this date, no?”  
“As I said: I don’t have to love you.” Despite what the words on his chest say.  
But she’s here with him. She agreed to this date though she might be sceptical of this soulmate thing.  
Weirdly, that soothes him. The fact that this doesn’t mean the world to her or anything... it’s as if that means he can’t do wrong as much. She doesn’t expect anything of him, she didn’t imagine her soulmate so much... so he can’t be a disappointment for her. He can just be himself and maybe she’ll fall in love with him and maybe she won’t and... it’s fine. Just like he might fall for her or he won’t.  
It’s the first time he has that thought and it relaxes him. Nothing has to happen. But everything possibly could.  
“You don’t,” he therefore says. She doesn’t have to love him, no matter what the universe believes. “We only now met each other. Let’s get to know each other. And not do anything we wouldn’t do if we didn’t have these.”  
He makes a gesture to his own mark that’s covered again.  
Other people fall in love too, don’t they? People who don’t have soulmates. Why not do it like them? Date first, then see if you want to get exclusive, taking it slow. Soulmates often run into it because they know that they are perfect for each other. They don’t have to do that if Jade doesn’t want to. Heck, it does take so much pressure off of Beck somehow.  
“Okay,” Jade agrees after a long look, before their food arrives.

 

Their date goes great – as goes every one after that.  
They date casually (or tell themselves that it’s casually, though it’s so not for either) for about three months, then they get together.  
It happens on a date. They’re out eating again and want to go to the movies afterwards. And there, Jade asks the question that has been on her tongue for too long: “Wanna be exclusive?”  
It comes out of nowhere. Jade also tries to sound casual as she asks.  
Beck looks up from his food in surprise and then beams. “I do.”  
Jade can’t help but smile to, more than happy, and they lean over to each other and kiss.  
They only very slowly break apart from each other again. Beck looks Jade in the eye and then says: “Actually – and I don’t know if you’ll like hearing this, but... I love you.”  
He has realized that he loved her about a week ago when he has watched her read through a story he once wrote and brought with him to one of their dates after they talked about old stories of theirs on an earlier date. Jade seemed amused by the story and teased him a bit here and there because of how the phrased some things. But in her eyes, he saw that she also loved the story. And he enjoyed her teasing because he knew himself that the story wasn’t all that good and because the teasing was not mean at all. Not to mention how he loved her amusement for the parts where she was supposed to be amused – and her actually complimenting him with short words every now and then for different plot points.  
When he watched her then and listened to her, he realized that he indeed has fallen in love with her.  
And maybe it’s too soon to say those words but he’s feeling them, so... He bets Jade won’t like it too much, after she said right from the start that them falling in love doesn’t have to happen despite their soulmate status and the words on their chests.  
She now also looks at him in silence for a while, before she decides to give in. Heck, she has felt the same for so long now. Though she didn’t want to, she didn’t want to give herself up to fate.  
“I love you, too.”

 

After they get together, Jade doesn’t constantly cover her wrist anymore where her mark has once been. She only does it anymore if she wants to wear something around her wrist so her outfit is complete but for no other reason.  
And promptly, the morning after she got together with Beck, her mother asks: “Jade? What happened to your mark?”  
They sit around the table, she, her mother and her little half-brother, and eat breakfast.  
Her mother must have noticed her not wearing anything around her wrist while she otherwise always does. That’s why she must’ve looked out for the mark she hasn’t seen for so long, because she knew something must be different.  
She sounds worried now. As if she suddenly thinks Jade only started covering her mark because it vanished without her meeting her soulmate or alike.  
But Jade simply answers: “I met... my so called soulmate.”  
Her mother’s eyes widen, as do her brother’s and he asks excited: “You did? When? Yesterday?”  
“Didn’t you and Beck...?” her mother asks slowly. She’s sure her daughter told her yesterday evening, when she finally came back, that she and Beck got together.  
“It’s Beck,” Jade answers.  
Her mother and her brother look at her in surprise. They have heard that name quite a few times over the last months. She has gone on dates constantly with him and her brother soon started giggling when she mentioned another date with that boy they don’t even know. Because just talking about dates with him almost made Jade smile.  
Jade explains because she sees especially her mother’s confusion: “I haven’t had that mark anymore for three months now. That’s when we finally talked to each other.”  
Her mother asks: “Why didn’t you tell us?”  
Jade shrugs. “I didn’t want you to make a big deal out of it.”  
Her mother looks at her for a long moment, then: “I’m really happy for you, Jade. I hope you’ll introduce us one day.”  
“Sure,” Jade answers and she knows it will be rather sooner and later. She wants her mother and her brother to meet Beck – and him to meet them. They all mean so much to her.

Not a week later the introductions are done. And she’s over at his house for the first time and meets his parents there.  
It’s a short introduction before Beck takes Jade up to his room to show her that and they stay there the rest of her visit.  
He says good-bye at the front door to her a few hours later and afterwards walks back to his parents in the living room. His mother stands at the window and looks after Jade as she leaves. “She’s your girlfriend?” she asks sceptically. “Why?”  
And what kind of question is that? Beck furrows his brow. “What do you mean?”  
“Have you looked at her?” his mother asks, glancing outside again.  
Beck doesn’t get it. “She’s beautiful.” What else to see?  
Now, it’s his father’s turn to voice an opinion: “Maybe you should rather concentrate on your school work than on girls.”  
What’s with his parents? What has gotten into them? Are they seriously... judging Jade? Because of her looks or something?  
Yes, he knows she isn’t the most polite person. She’s not overly friendly. She greeted his parents nicely enough but didn’t at all engage in small talk until Beck pulled her up to his room with him. But judging her by that and... by the way she dresses, apparently?  
It makes him damn angry.  
“Seriously?” he asks in a threatening tone of voice.  
How can they judge over Jade like this though they know she’s his soulmate?  
Oh, wait. Don’t they know? No, obviously they don’t. Beck should’ve known. He didn’t make a secret out of it but his parents also don’t constantly check his wrist or anything. How should they have noticed the mark vanishing?  
But now that Beck thinks about it for even a split second, he realizes if they would’ve seen, if they would’ve noticed, they would’ve asked him about it, would’ve asked who his soulmate is and if they could meet them. They would’ve demanded to meet them.  
And they would’ve been happy with whomever he would’ve presented because soulmates are oh so special, isn’t that true?  
He can’t help but present the inside of his left wrist to them now, to let them know, to stop them from thinking so awfully about Jade, whom he already loves so much. “Look!”  
And no, he doesn’t think them being soulmates should be the only reason for his parents to accept Jade in his life. It even disgusts him to know that they will now and apparently wouldn’t have otherwise. But he knows they will notice his missing mark rather sooner than later and better let them know right away.  
“Where is your mark?” his mother asks with widened eyes.  
“It vanished when she said those words to me,” he responds coldly.  
“What?” his father says, as if sure that he must’ve misheard.  
Beck puts his hand on his heart. “I have a mark here now.”  
“Oh, Beck,” his mother makes and his father asks: “Why didn’t you tell us?”  
“When did this happen?” his mother then wants to know.  
It’s not like Beck didn’t say it on purpose. He thought they might notice his missing mark on his wrist but... He didn’t want to come to them and outright talk about it. Not when he still felt so unsure about the possible relationship – with them never taking his insecurities seriously.  
“I wanted to explore the relationship on my own at first. But yes, she is my soulmate. So don’t talk bad about her.”  
His parents aren’t as happy about this as they always thought they’d be. They thought it would be a joyous day when Beck would tell them about his mark having vanished. Not meeting a weird unlikeable girl and Beck then telling them that she of all people is his soulmate.  
But they do apologize and make an effort to get to know Jade every time she comes over from then on.

 

They agree to let absolutely noone know what their chests say, which words are engraved there. It’s of nobody’s business and Jade wants to protect those words at all costs.  
She finds out how easy it is to cover them with make-up. She doesn’t sweat, so it’s never a problem, unless she goes into water. Then, she wears band-aid. Beck always puts band-aid on his chest whenever there is a risk of his chest showing, as that’s also when he goes into water or it’s so warm he might be sweating.

The words have another effect on them. Jade barely ever says “I love you” first. Not that she’s otherwise so into telling people she loves them, even if she does. But the words on their chests... It’s as if she fears that as soon as she says it and Beck naturally tells her “I love you, too” that one of them could die the next second. It’s stupid, she knows. Beck wouldn’t even have to phrase it like that if he says it back.  
Though one lazy evening in the RV – where Beck moved as his parents were way too nosy about what he was doing, also with Jade –, Beck does. They’re lying on the couch together and Jade just says it, quietly, weirdly overwhelmed by that feeling in moments like these sometimes: “I love you.”  
“I love you, too,” he whispers and wants to kiss her forehead, but she immediately pulls back.  
“Don’t,” she says, harshly.  
Only for a second, he’s confused, but then het gets it, because he gets her. The look on his face turns amused. “Are you scared?” He hasn’t noticed it before that point. He never thought she could be scared of one of them dying if they say the words on their chests in a situation like this.  
“Me, scared? Right,” she only answers, rolling her eyes. Now, there’s no reasons to be anymore anyway, as their conversation already has gone on.  
She cuddles back up to him, lies her head against his chest where her confession of love is forever engraved on his body. And quietly, she asks after a moment: “Aren’t you?”  
He has to think about that for a moment, then: “Not in a situation like this. What can happen? We can never say goodbye in that way though, can never part ways with those being our last words.”  
They definitely never can.  
But she just ends up barely saying “I love you” and when she does, he phrases his response a little different, adds her name or alike, because he knows she doesn’t like it otherwise.  
Mostly, he says it first though and she responds. And more often than not, she just tells him to tell her he loves her and that becomes her “I love you” of sorts. He takes it as that.

 

The thing is, with them convering their marks and never even talking about it, nobody in school seems to know they are actually soulmates. Both only realize that after months of being together. Beck suddenly understands why some girls are still flirting with him though they should know he’s destined to be with Jade.  
Jade still doesn’t know if she should believe in this destiny thing, in soulmates being the one and only. But others are very much convinced of the whole thing and she’s sure no other girl would dare touching Beck if they knew that he had a soulmate and found it already in Jade.  
So she suggests, when she sees, as Beck checks his TheSlap profile, that some girls commented on his last status: “We should make a video for TheSlap where we tell everyone we’re soulmates.”  
That’s the easiest way to let absolutely all of them know.  
Beck turns to her in surprise. They sit on the couch in his RV together, the TV is running, Jade is leaned against Beck and Beck has pulled his laptop to him to shortly check his mails and his profile.  
“You sure?” he asks.  
Jade sits up, drawing back from him, raising her eyebrows at him. “What makes you ask that?” she asks viciously. Why shouldn’t he be fine with them telling? He was into being soulmates right away. Or is he keeping his options open now after all?  
“I’m...” Beck slowly says. “I’m not sure. But don’t you think there would be people who wanted to see proof?”  
“So?” Like she cares what other people want. Obviously, the only real proof would be the words engraved on their chests and they won’t show those.  
Beck looks at her for a moment, before he gently says: “What if they try to get it?”  
“Oh,” she makes softly. He has actually thought about this. And he’s right. “Girls would rip your shirt apart to see if that’s true!”  
She’s disgusted by the mere thought and Beck puts a hand on her arm in a calming manner. “Maybe they won’t.”  
“No, they would,” Jade says and she knows it’s true. They would. They so would. “So don’t dare telling anyone.”  
That makes Beck smile suddenly: “It was your idea.”  
Of course she has to glare at him for that, which makes him smile even wider, before he leans forward, kissing her softly. She can’t help but return the kiss.

 

The words on her chest mock her, whenever she glances down on them, whenever she has to cover them with make-up, whenever she looks into the mirror after showering.  
“I love you, too.”  
Yeah, right. He loves her so much that he wasn’t happy in the relationship anymore. He loves her so much that he needed to tell her that in front of everyone. He loves her so much that the opinion of others about their relationship are more important to him than she is.  
How much she hates him. How much she would like to burn those words off her chest, the words about his supposed love for her that’s not real.  
Oh, they’ve been broken up before. They are both thick headed and passionate about some things and each other. Their emotions run deep and strong and sometimes, their fights have made them break up. It was nothing like this.  
As days turns into weeks and then into months, she wonders if there were never supposed to be romantic soulmates after all. In her love for him, she sometimes started to believe that soulmates were real and true and that it was the most beautiful and fulfilling thing ever. And she wished it for everyone whom she loved.  
If soulmates are real... There also are some that aren’t romantic soulmates. Were Beck and she supposed to be that? But why has she felt so ridiculously attracted to him from the first second on?  
She tries to behave around him, tries to not care anymore, to not destroy whatever they might have left. But only when she’s alone in bed at night, she confesses to herself that the words on his chest still hold true. She loves him with all her heart. And she fears that she forever will.

 

His hand finds his way to his own chest way too often. He randomly touches himself there all the time, as if having his hand close to the words about Jade’s love to him gets him closer to Jade.  
He doesn’t know what happened. He doesn’t know where it went wrong. He was so happy with Jade. They were actually soulmates. She loved him, like the words on his chest promised.  
He knows their relationship wasn’t perfect. They bickered often. Beck tried to stop with that. He knows what soulmate relationships look like. He has so many of them in his family.  
He tried to be the same way with Jade, but she got irritated and angry with him more and more often and it made him lash out at her almost as often as she did with him. And finally he told her that he wasn’t happy anymore – knowing that she also wasn’t.  
She broke up with him. She didn’t try talking to him about it or anything. She avoided him before and then just broke up with him.  
Maybe, she doesn’t love him.  
Though his parents never totally warmed up to Jade, they are shocked about the seperation. You don’t break up with your soulmate.  
But what do they know? Not to mention that Beck and Jade broke up before (never seriously, but still)... what does being soulmates even mean?  
Jade said from the beginning that it might not meant to be, that she didn’t have to love him despite everything. Now, she doesn’t.  
Yet... She did love him. And she always treated him like that. She always cared for him. Damn, did he feel secure around her. He couldn’t do anything wrong. She loved him exactly the way he was.  
He sees his own eyes widen in the mirror, in which he has looked at the words of his chest once more, two months into their break-up.  
She loved him exactly the way he was. Has he even been himself lately?  
He wanted to have a forever with Jade and wanted to make that happen by having the relationship with her that all the soulmates in his life have with each other. All those people who already live their forever.  
That certainly changed his behaviour. He tried to be someone else again. He thought too much about who he should be for his soulmate, just like he did as a child. He wasn’t himself.  
And the thing is: He is enough for Jade. He has always been enough for Jade. That took all the pressure off on their first date, her not expecting him to be a certain person. Why did he started pressuring himself at one point again?  
He has never thought about it, but now he does and he feels even more terrible than before. Did he make Jade fell out of love with him due to his changed behaviour?  
But why didn’t Jade talk to him about it? And isn’t him trying to be someone else also kind of him being himself? Because that’s the way he is. He’s stupid sometime and can’t help but wonder how to do everything right. He might not show it, his friends would never guess how much he cares about being a... a normal person...  
He also hasn’t cared too much about it around Jade. He has engulfed in his darker sides, has enjoyed just being who he is.  
He knows he screwed up and he wants everything to go back to how it used to be. He wants Jade to love him.

He tries talking to her again but she fights him at every turn.  
She just can’t do it. She’s sure he wants to talk about the possibility of them being platonic soulmates and she doesn’t want to hear it. She doesn’t want him to tell her that he loves her but not in the way they might’ve thought in between. That the words on her chest still hold true but in a different way.  
But she realizes, especially with his frustrated and angry reactions that... that he’s still in love with her too. Can that be? Does he want to talk to her about getting back together?  
She sees in his eyes that he doesn’t want to go on a date with Meredith but he can’t describe to Tori why, he can’t explain what he feels for Jade that makes it impossible for him to date another girl.  
She may be jealous but she knows Meredith won’t make him happy. She should in everybody’s opinion, but she won’t. Jade knows Beck. And yes, maybe she wants to see how he’ll handle it, watch him squirm a little. And maybe she’s wrong about it all and then he should feel free to date. If there’s nothing between them anymore...  
But by now she’s sure he still loves her as well and possibly wants to get back together with her. She plans to sing a song for him that she wrote. To settle this. Depending on his reaction, she will know if he still loves her in the same way she loves him or if he thinks they’re platonic soulmates or whatever. Without having to hear him say it if it’s the latter. Those would be words that would destroy her. Shouldn’t words like that also be engraved somewhere on your body if there is someone who can destroy you so easily?  
Beck does go onto the date with Meredith, because he feels like he lost any chance with Jade. He doesn’t know why she won’t let him explain but if he can’t...  
Before Jade walks onto stage, she can see him sitting with Meredith, looking really irritated. Well, she can see that he’s really irritated. Meredith seems to have no idea. Jade smirks. Meredith is obviously going on his nerves but he will never say that.  
Yeah, Jade likes watching him like this around other girls, him pretty much silently suffering, because that’s who he is.  
And when she walks onto stage, he doesn’t even see him with Meredith anymore, but instead standing with Tori. Before she even starts to sing, Beck is fully captured by her. And she knows it’ll be okay.  
As does he, as he listens to the lyrics and looks into her eyes, with her looking directly back.

They end up in the bed in the RV together that night. Neither falls asleep afterwards but they keep looking at each other, almost hungrily.  
At one point, Jade runs her finger over the mark on his chest, over the words that will be the last she’ll ever say to him.  
She doesn’t need to say them as she traces the letters with her finger for him to know that she means those words.  
When she’s done tracing the last letter, he quietly says: “I love you so much, Jade.”  
Jade has looked at the words before, now looks back in his face, to his eyes, to his lips, to his eyes again, before she kisses him. Then she whispers back: “I love you, too.”

o  
O  
o

She’s sick and they decided for her to come out of the hospital back home for Beck to be able to tend to her around the clock and for her to feel as comfortable as possible.  
He’s sitting at her bedside now. He’s playing with her fingers like he has so often done, especially back when they were young and in school. He suddenly thinks he hasn’t done it often enough over the course of their lives.  
He assumes Jade to be asleep, until there is her voice, weaker than it ever was: “Beck.”  
He takes a deep breath, before he leans down and kisses her softly, hoping to give her some comfort.  
He knows she is in pain. She has been for so long and the meds barely help her anymore.  
Jade searches his eyes with hers as soon as they break apart. He doesn’t draw back too much, stays close. And maybe, that’s the only reason, he can hear her whisper, though it’s almost silent: “I love you.”  
Something inside of him freezes. This it it. He knows it.  
And he knows she will hold onto life if he isn’t ready to let her go. She will clutch to it if she has to. Maybe, she’s still only there because she knows how much he needs her.  
But she’s suffering and he can’t force her to stay. And the words on her chest, that have been engraved there for so many years now, are the words that will let her know that she can let go. That he’s letting go of her. That it’s okay for her to leave.  
He draws in a shaky breath, closes his eyes for a moment to gather the strength. He feels her hand clasping to his and he opens his eyes again, looking straight back into hers.  
He sees that it takes everything out of her at this point to even keep her eyes open. He can’t keep making her do this. He has to let her go.  
Not as strong as he wished he could, but broken and in a whisper and yet as the absolute truth, he whispers back the words he has barely ever said in his life. The words that let a last smile run over her face, before she’s gone. The words that he has read on her chest so often, that he has traced and kissed there and will never do again.  
“I love you, too.”


End file.
